Finding ways to make people feel special makes them feel happy. And, we all know that when we make other people happy, WE are happy. Right? It’s a little bit tricky though, because helping someone else feel good about themselves should come from a selfless place.
I think it’s just a bonus that when we make other people happy and help them feel better about themselves, it boomerangs back at us. That’s why sending flowers, writing a love letter or baking a birthday cake from scratch feels so good. We just know in our hearts it’s going to make the other person feel good in the moment.
I love to dance! Always have. But, when I lost my vision, I lost my confidence and ability to move my body to music in front of other people. It actually hurt my soul.
All of my friends and I would go out to our favourite bar and everyone would dance but me. Finally one night, one of my friends showed up and asked me to dance. I said, “No thank you.” She insisted. I shared with her why I didn’t want to and that I was honestly scared. She promised to keep hold of me the whole time and that she didn’t care… we were going to dance.
She took my hand and led me to the crowded dance floor of flashing and strobing lights. I cried. We laughed. She never let go of me.
We danced. I danced for the first time blind.
The song was “Tainted Love,” and to this day I will never forget what my friend did for me or how she made me feel about myself. She helped me conquer a fear and she gave me my confidence back. I’m still dancing today. Thank you, Tanya. ❤️
Do you want to help someone feel that good about themselves and feel the impact days, months and maybe even years later?
Here are 5 ways to help someone feel good and let them know they matter:
- Give from the heart
This one is simple, but typically requires you to be creative. I mentioned earlier, sending flowers just because you are thinking of someone. Baking a cake from scratch for your friend’s event instead of buying one declares “Hey, I think you are so special to me.” Writing a poem, a note or a letter to someone you love, and even going the extra mile by putting a stamp on it and mailing it the old fashioned way might say more than even the words you write.
The possibilities are endless here. Your creativity is boundless and someone special awaits your loving kindness. Whatever will you do?
2. Just take a Moment
Yesterday, I got a text out of the blue from a long-time friend that said, “Hi! I’ve been thinking about you. How are you doing? :-)”
The biggest smile crossed my face and it made me so happy. So happy that she took the time to say that. It made my day. That’s it folks! That’s all it takes for some people. Just a quick text that takes all of 10 seconds. Maybe for you it might be a quick phone call or an email. Whatever it is for you to let that other person know they are special, go do that. Right now. 🙂
3. Pay Them Compliments
It’s often said that humans need connection. And, one of the easiest ways to connect with someone else is to make them feel good. Let them know you believe they are special and that they matter.
One way to do this is to give them pure, genuine compliments. By genuine I mean the compliment should either begin or end with “you.”
You are amazing. You are an incredible chef. Those jeans look great on you. You rocked it tonight!
It’s important that your compliment is real and has no other intention other than to make the recipient feel fabulous. If you are giving one just to get one back, maybe you need a little extra loving kindness for yourself? Check out 6 Ways to Boost Your Self Esteem.
4. Listen with purpose
Have you ever been in one of those conversations when you are talking and you share something, and before you can continue, the other person is jumping in with a story that may or may not relate to what you just told them? Don’t get me wrong, sometimes this can be helpful. To hear other experiences, but if you truly want to help someone feel really good about themselves, listen with purpose.
Be present and not in a hurry to jump in . Don’t just be waiting for them to stop talking so you can start.
Actually hear what they are saying and feel their emotions, situation and understand the moment. It’s not your moment. Not this time.
You can say things like:
- I understand
- I get why you would feel this way
- Tell me more
- Then what did you do?
- What will you do now?
- I’m so sorry this happened to/for you
And to really be there for them, one important thing you can say is, “What do you need from me… I am here for you.”
5. Show your gratitude
It’s amazing how far a simple “thank you” can go. In business to me it’s become an overlooked formality. Showing your gratitude shows not only your appreciation for whatever service has been provided, but I believe it’s extended to the individual personally as well. I think that gets lost at times.
But, if we’re talking day-to-day in making someone feel good about themselves, showing your true appreciation for a friend or a loved one can go a long, long way.
Saying to your best friend, “I love you and I appreciate you.” Wow! How powerful is that statement? You are acknowledging to your friend how extremely important your friendship means to you.
You could say to your partner or your spouse, “I appreciate how hard you’ve been working lately. Thank you so much.”
Or simply, “I love and appreciate you for who you are. Thank you for being you.” You would be amazed how much power these words have and how good they can make someone feel.
In this moment, I would like to say thank you to YOU.
I appreciate the time you take to read my thoughts, stories and posts. I appreciate that you take a moment to share them and create conversations.
Thank you for being a part of my journey.
Now go! Go and thank someone for being a part of YOUR journey.
Go out there and use these 5 ways to make someone feel good about themselves. And, I’m sure you can think of many more ways too. Be creative. You can do it.
It’s in you to be happy, therefore it’s in you to make other people happy.
Can you remember a time someone made you feel really good about yourself? Please share in the comments below.